The Dating Game

Since the bad break up I went through back in November I have whole heartedly thrown nay, CATAPULTED myself into the wonderful world of dating. It has been interesting to say the least, and I have learnt a few lessons, which I think I should share with the friends and readers of LALI...

1. When dating, let the guy know all you are interested in is a date
When I was in university, I remember being at a rave and Mr. Play was on the mic telling girls to fix their faces when they are approached for a dance because 'A DANCE IS NOT A RELATIONSHIP AND A RELATIONSHIP IS NOT A DANCE'. This is true of dating too. It's just a date, an opportunity for us to get to know one another so don't let the guy see it as a down payment for future 'fun' or anything else like that. You're just sharing company, capece?

2.If you realise you are not interested, MOVE ON
I was almost strong-armed into a relationship with a nice enough guy because he was so on it, and he's a nice guy and all. I enjoyed his company and his dates. He had imagination and was such a gentleman, but he just didn't set my heart alight, you know? And he stayed pleading for me to just give him a chance but I genuinely like him...enough to not lead him on. I had to be firm and I felt like the biggest bitch but it was very necessary. I'm NOT gonna do him like that and do the next girl out of an amazing guy. He just wasn't for me.

3. Do not date a guy who's company you cannot stand
Now this sounds standard, but I wanted attention and got into the habit of dates to such a degree that I was prepared to bare his company so that I wasn't bored at home. But then I realised, 'Girl, you know you'd rather sleep, study, bore your own eyes out with a sharp implement a la Houston' than spend time with this dude. So I finally got a clue and got rid of him.

4. Don't get your hopes up
Just as YOU don't want a guy to get obsessed in a matter of days, remember to slow your roll. He's sussing you out too, and he also has the prerogative to say, uh-uh she's not the girl for me. Chalk it down to experience and keep it moving.

5. Paying...
I personally like to go on dates which I know I could bail myself out of if needs must. If he has table manners like a horse, I can just leave my part of the bill and bounce. Or cover it if he ain't got enough. Or just pay to shut the dude up if he goes on a rant about girls who just wanna take his money. If paying is not an option for you right now (think temporarily without funds, NOT broke), then before we go I will let a brother know look I can't get this. I set out the terms and conditions so that when we get there we all know where we stand. But if I initiated the date I will pick up the check.

6. Venue
I do not prescribe a date venue but 'back to your place' does not constitute a date. It represents a sad lack of imagination and an opportunistic leech. Particularly if we just met and I am not giving you those vibes.


Happy dating!
Nsoromma xXx

Happy 1st Birthday LALI!

It has been a year since Life and Living It's first entry was posted, and since then we have come a long way! A year on, 87 posts later and with 49 followers we are still going strong. I would like to thank everyone who has stuck with us even though we haven't always been faithful with our posts! I would also like to congratulate Sankofa, Nsoromma and Friday's Afro on not backing out. Anyway, I'll stop here because it's starting to sound like an acceptance speech. But before I go, I'll leave you with my top 5 LALI blog posts.

2.Getting up Close and Biblical
3.Mind the Gap: Some General Observations About London Travel
4.Bonkers Banking in the Land of Gold
5.The calm compulsion

Have a nice weekend!

Phamous Philms

I love the video to Boga Boga by Sarkodie, I thought it was slick and well done. It fits the song so well, which is rare for a GH music video. My GH people's finally making it happen behind the lens for the good music. So I did a little search on the director of the video, Gyo Gyimah from Phamous Philms.

Phamous Philms are also responsible for the I think I Like Am video by VIP, Fire by Becca ft. Samini (terrible song!) Fresh Ones (Shaka Zulu) by 4x4 and Swagger by Ruff 'n' Smooth.

I'm impressed! The poorest, is the video for I think I Like Am, but to be honest I think it's a bad song anyway. The picture quality is so much better, although the shirts worn by VIP in that video are shocking and I don't understand why Ruff n' Smooth and 4x4 are only using light or white girls in their respective videos. Is Ghana not generally a country of black people? Am I wrong for wanting a bit of black female representation in these video's...Anyhoo....The video quality is a definite marked improvement from old school video's like Obour's Menwu Biom or Kontihene's Esi (damn! I still love this song!).

A solid portfolio by Phamous Philms. Hopefully bad quality music videos are now a thing of the past. Now time to tackle content...


This is just a quick one but I just saw a couple of articles on BBC that made me "hmm" a little. First up is a man I'm tempted to call an idiot. Hey it's just my opinion! Anyway, this lovely gentleman from our esteemed country has decided to name his son Silvio Berlusconi. O_O Really? You're going to name your child after the Prime Minister of a country with, quite frankly, dodgy immigration policies (particularly towards Africans) and a country where one can find signs claiming "There are no black Italians" at football games? This man who is a walking joke to most people (including Italians). This is a man who is more known for calling Obama "suntanned" and his numerous plastic surgeries than anything actually worthwhile. This is a man, who after a devastating earthquake in Abruzzo region of Italy last year, advised the homeless survivors to treat their plight as a "camping weekend". This is a man who has happily admitted that Italian deportation centres are no better than concentration camps. I could go on an on about Berlusconi's numerous faults but then I would just get more depressed. No wonder somebody clocked him one.

This was on the front page of the news section btw. I just think it's sad that this is the second time in a few months that I've seen Ghana mentioned on the front page of the BBC news website. The first time for a bogus earthquake, and the second time for this nonsense. Makes you wonder....

Here's an excerpt from the article:

A Ghanaian immigrant to Italy has named his son after Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi, despite his government's tough policy on immigration.
Anthony Boahene told an Italian newspaper: "I like the way Berlusconi talks, the way he moves."
Asked about Mr Berlusconi's tough stance on immigration, he said: "It's fine, laws need to be observed."
Mr Boahene said he would like his son Silvio to study politics and to become president of Ghana or Italy.
 Second up is this story about a recall on baby slings in America and Canada. I used to love baby slings and I remember eagerly waiting for Friday's Afro to drop mini-Friday's Afro just so I could carry him in a sling! Then one day I realised that baby slings are just posh versions of this:
End of story.

Flashback of the Day: Alicia Keys - Superwoman

I'm feeling positive for once on a Monday. I have completed two of the three application I wanted to do for the weekend. I'm not stressed about the other one. It probably just isn't for me. I'm just gonna keep working hard.

This lil' gem by Alicia Keys is not to far back for a flashback, but it is very apt at the moment for me, Superwoman by Alicia Keys...But that wig in the boardroom thou, No No!

Alicia Keys - Superwoman (Official Music Video). Watch more top selected videos about: Alicia_Keys

The calm compulsion

In this short post I'm going to talk about my body, I know I know.

I'm so sick of it being such a big concern. I'm not body dysmorphic or anything but why oh why can't it just obey me and not flow, or protrude where it's not supposed to? I don't know if this is sounding like the most shallow post ever, but I really feel that I can't really talk about weight issues to my eat-what-she-wants sister or my eat!-eat! mother, and if you mention it to other gals, they just assume that you're chatting s*"t and fishing for compliments.

What I really want to know is how does one REALLY get over body issues? Put on or Lose weight 'just because' and not let it take over one's life?
I find that when I used to stuff my face I was doing it with an attitude - 'I don't even care! I LUUURRVE my body'- and when (in final year of school) I used to starve myself and I lost weight, I was only temporarily happy with the amount I annoying!
Maybe this is just a case of never human beings never being happy and I don't want to sound too neurotic, but seriously can anyone help to stop me obsessing about this issue, it hasn't got embarrassing yet, but I don't want it to get to the point where my favourite conversation starter is ' have you read about the ...... diet?' and my most profound thought is 'how many calories in a polo mint?'

The thing is although it is very present it's still quite quiet, I'm not physically stopping my life in order to devote time to scale-hopping, and I basically eat whatever (within reason) it just amazes me how it's always ALWAYS there, and has been for about 10 years!

Does anyone out there feel 100% happy with themselves and even if not, how has anyone ended the diet-cycle or the scoff-cycle?


A taste of Ghana (pt.1)

When I first came to GH, I spent a lot of time taking pictures of food. Yep- food. It was just so refreshing to see  the "real" versions of so many of my favourite dishes after years of being forced to cope with the budget versions. These pictures of food were slightly awkward to explain whenever people decided to look through the pics on my camera. Since I don't generally like to advertise the fact that I blog to randoms, I eventually resorted to just saying "a friend wanted me to take pictures of what Ghanaian foods look like" as a means of explanation. It's not technically a lie....Well I realised that my long-promised "food" post had not materialised (sorry Afrocentric!) and so what better time to remedy this than now?

 Tangerines: When I first saw these, I was like "why is this woman trying to palm us off with unripe fruit?" Let's just say that I finally saw the light when I took them home and got under their bright green skin. Yummy's not even the word. Here they are in my fruit basket with one random "normal"-coloured tangerine.

OrangesI have a sliiiiiight obsession with oranges but I've never really taken to English oranges- too tasteless. In the ATL, the oranges from the Korean supermarket were a fave because they tasted "like Ghana oranges". So here's the real thing and they're a dream for a lazy cow like me because you can get them ready-peeled! This is a before and the after after I completely demolished it, complete with lip-gloss marks....

Alasa/ AdaswaI literally screamed when I saw these. I remember them from when I was little and I hadn't had them since my mum randomly brought a couple back from a holiday when I was around 12/13. When ripe, these are quite sweet and they have about 4 shiny black seeds inside each one. Smallish in size, if you chew the flesh for a while it turns into chewing gum! How cool is that? They can also be incredibly sour when not fully ripe; kinda like any sweet from the sour section in a pick 'n' mix. Everybody tells me they're called alasa but I swear down I used to call them adaswa or something like that when I was little. Can anybody help me out with this?

Mangoes: I kept meaning to take pics of the small Ghana mangoes you rarely find in the UK but um, they never lasted that long. Ghana mangoes are my all-time favourite fruit so that's my excuse.

Pineapples: Eating pineapples in Ghana makes you steadily pissed that you've been spending money on impostor fruit that can't hold a candle to the ones here. Sweet is not even the word. Amaaaazing and the taste is simply sensational. Cutting pineapples, however, is not the business....

So here we are for starters and hopefully I won't take the piss in producing a part two!

I Like You...But I Love Somebody Else!

This is the wonderful Tic Tac line from Kwani Kwani which me and the other girls love so much. In fact I have always wanted to say it to somebody. Which actually sounds quite mean however, I don't want to say it to be mean...well actually....errmmmmm...look right, THAT IS A LINE AND A HALF!

Anyhoo, as per Nsoromma, this post is gonna be all confused about love. You see, recently I (er-hmm) acquired a toy boy. And apart from not being overly broad, he is the physical definition of my type and SOOOOOO cute. And sweet. And adorable. Awwwwwwwwwwwwww. Jheeze. He approached me when he caught me making eyes at him. Can you believe I actually got caught? S-L-I-P-P-I-N-G! Jheeze!

But now the gloss is dissipating because his situ is somewhat messy. He has a clingy ex and a long-time-friend stroke love interest. Now tbh, I can't really complain to much about that but I will as my attention is more than a little divided. You see there's this dude my family has been tryna set me up with who I'm surprised I actually quite like. He's intelligent, kind, funny, cheeky and oddly sexy even though he's not physical my type much.

I guess I'm just a bit confused as the second guy seems pretty much perfect which scares the crap out of me but I know that with work the youngie has potential. The problem is that the second guy moves sooooo slow, something he warned me of but in real life, W-O-W, it's pretty much incomparable. Do I wait for him, as it seems the wait may be well worth it, as he has admitted to liking me?

But to limit myself from liking him too much whilst he moves like a snail I've been giving up a lot of my time (in retrospect, probably WAY too much) to the youngie. He's cute, he's sweet and I'm a bit bored so methinks why not. But now he has said 'I LOVE YOU'. Oh dear. I just kind of hug him and change the subject. But he knows I'm avoiding it.

Anyhoo, the reason I quoted the relationship guru that is Tic Tac (Muhahahahahaha!!! Mad crazy laugh time!), is that truly I like both guys and while I have been WAITING years to use this line. I'm starting to get scared that I may just have to!

Oh and in related news...the ex who shall forever remain hated is actually in a relationship with the girl he cheated on me for and in what feels like returning to a past life I am starting to fancy a promoter friend of mine. The wickedest thing is that I make cracks about it all the time to him, but now it's actually true.

I can only sigh and smh at my self.
Nsoromma...COTH xXx

Happy Independence!

This is a very quick one. I just really want to wish Ghana a happy 53rd birthday, and happy independence day to all of you. Ghana has come a long way, and we have a lot to be proud of. However you choose to celebrate, have fun and stay safe.

Cadbury and Kraft: Where does that leave us?

Remember late last year when the colourful and lively "Zingolo" advert lit up our t.v. screens? If you need reminding, then check this out.


Before that, I had never been so excited to see my fave show break for adverts. And I STILL love watching it. As annoying as the "Zingolo" tune may be, we can't deny it is catchy. Also, to see a Ghanaian artist on another channel other than on OBE really is something! But the most important thing is that the advert made the British public aware of where the cocoa beans that make their chocolate come from. It also confirmed Cadbury's move to Fairtrade. Fairtrade is a non profit organisation which ensures that the people in poorer parts of the world who produce the raw materials needed to make some of the things we enjoy, such as tea, wine, or even cotton shirts are not ripped off.

Sadly, there are not a lot of companies that are Fairtrade certified. And it's sad that there are people all over the world who are not given the opportunity to make a decent living. I'm not going to pretend that I always check for the "Fairtrade" mark before I carelessly throw a packet of biscuits or a bag of sweets into my shopping trolley. But the Cadbury's advert has made me more aware.

The news of Cadbury's takeover by American food company, Kraft, left us in the UK wondering what would become of the Bourneville factory in Birmingham. Most importantly, what will happen to the thousands of jobs it provides, if it is to close down?

I would hate for all those jobs to be lost, trust me, I would. But Kraft's chief executive Irene Rosenfeld said "[she] warmly welcomes Cadbury employees into the Kraft Foods family". However, what will happen to the Cocoa farmers in Ghana? There has been so much discussion and dialogue over the loss of British jobs, but I haven't heard a peep about the fate of the Ghanaian farmers with no welfare system to fall back on and with little else but their cocoa farms. I have searched up and down the Cadbury's website, and can't find anything about how Kraft's takeover will affect the livelihoods of those producing the cocoa beans.

Let me finish by congratulating Cadbury for it's efforts in supporting Fairtade all over the word; in countries such as St. Lucia, India and South Africa.

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